Life is Short…Laugh!

Dear Reader:

I came across the wittiest imaginary conversation between God and St. Francis of Assisi…the more I read…the more I smiled…and then chuckled. See for yourself: (If we can’t laugh at ourselves…we need a few lessons in humor.)

 

A conversation in heaven between God and St. Francis.

 “WHERE DID THE GREEN RECTANGLES COME FROM?”

God: St. Francis, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there in the USA? What happened to the dandelions, violets,thistle and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect, no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honeybees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.

St. Francis: It’s the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites.They started calling your flowers “weeds” and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.

God: Grass? But it’s so boring. It’s not colorful. It doesn’t attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It’s temperamental with temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?

St. Francis: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.

God: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast.That must make the Suburbanites happy.

St. Francis: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it, sometimes twice a week.

God: They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?

St. Francis: Not exactly Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.

God: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?

St. Francis: No, sir — just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.

God: Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?

St. Francis: Yes, sir.

God: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.

St. Francis: You aren’t going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.

God: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheers troke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost to enhance the soil. It’s a natural circle of life.

St. Francis: You’d better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.

God: No. What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and to keep the soil moist and loose?

St. Francis: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something  they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.

God: And where do they get this mulch?

St. Francis: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.

God: Enough! I don’t want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you’re in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?

St. Catherine: “Dumb and Dumber,” Lord. It’s a real stupid movie about…

God: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.

……………………………

So until tomorrow…Isn’t it bizarre that man can come up with more ideas to make more work for ourselves than anyone else? But… still our gardens provide sanctuary to us in a crazy, upside down world…and that is what is important.

 

I think this saying by Saint Francis of Assisi will be my mantra as I plug along with my monumental (hopefully once-in-a-lifetime) de-cluttering home project.

“Today is my favorite day” Winnie the Pooh

 

 

 

 

 

 

About Becky Dingle

I was born a Tarheel but ended up a Sandlapper. My grandparents were cotton farmers in Laurens, South Carolina and it was in my grandmother’s house that my love of storytelling began beside an old Franklin stove. When I graduated from Laurens High School, I attended Erskine College (Due West of what?) and would later get my Masters Degree in Education/Social Studies from Charleston Southern. I am presently an adjunct professor/clinical supervisor at CSU and have also taught at the College of Charleston. For 28 years I taught Social Studies through storytelling. My philosophy matched Rudyard Kipling’s quote: “If history were taught in the form of stories, it would never be forgotten.” Today I still spread this message through workshops and presentations throughout the state. The secret of success in teaching social studies is always in the story. I want to keep learning and being surprised by life…it is the greatest teacher. Like Kermit said, “When you’re green you grow, when you’re ripe you rot.”
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9 Responses to                                           Life is Short…Laugh!

  1. Jo Dufford says:

    Thanks for bringing a chuckle from deep inside and putting a smile on my face today. God knows everything, and I shouldn’t presume to know how God feels. But when I see the many things, humorous and otherwise, we do that make no sense, I can just picture Him shaking His head and saying, “I really thought ‘free will’ was a great gift.”

    • Becky Dingle says:

      YOU are too funny! “Free Will” is a slippery slope….we know how God must feel when we sigh at our children and impatiently say, “Just forget it…I’ll do it myself!”

  2. bcparkison says:

    This is to funny. Must share.

  3. I am going to have to make sure my son reads this!! He fertilizes, bags and also mulches LOL!

  4. How absolutely, amazingly, brilliantly fabulous this post is. And … so SO true too!
    Thank you so much for a truly great read. <3
    love ~ Cobs. x

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