Chapel of Hope Stories

Dear Reader:

The first day of December… Besides remembering to say ” Rabbit, Rabbit” … I feel a sense of anticipation upon waking up… knowing that by the end of December a special good-bye will encompass twelve months.. a whole year … not just one isolated month.

And isn’t it a comforting thought that the Christ Child arrived as the ” encore” act at the end of the month, the year of His birth, while simultaneously starting a whole new perception on time and everlasting life? The old ” chronos” ( precisely measured) time was now introduced to kairos” time – the appointed time by God to act on something. Quantitative vs Qualitative.

Yesterday Doodle and Harvey stopped by so Harvey could fix my stopped up ” john” … ten minutes in… Harvey was out. Everyone should have a “Harvey” in their family! What a blessing! Thank you Harvey!

I think there are three types of people when it comes to Christmas decorations… the early early birds who wrap up the left-over turkey on Thanksgiving Day and then start pulling out the Christmas decorations, the ” moderate” decorators who wait until December officially rolls around on the calendar ( like today) and the last minute decorators whose inherent traditions have them decorating the tree on Christmas Eve.

Ms Libra, me, is the moderate… and these days it depends on when Tommy can squeeze in the time to bring me my tree , set it up, and put on the lights… then I can take it from there… with a little help from my grandchildren elves.

This year ( and Doodle agreed with me) I find it harder than usual to give up fall and especially my beloved pumpkins …so I decided to “inchworm” into the Christmas season …decorating the beautiful green succulent pumpkin…( Susan Swicegood gave me Thanksgiving Day) … testing the Christmas waters.

So until tomorrow…

When I dropped a meal off to Vickie Tuesday she had taken advantage of her granddaughter, Crystal, who was home for Thanksgiving to get their tree and it was so beautiful… butterflies and flowers …Vickie’s two favorite things…

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Pooh

It is the first day of the month-December-so… ” Rabbit! Rabbit” and everyone have a memorable month and Christmas!

Dear Reader:

Yesterday, Tuesday, November 29, certainly lived up to this definition ( title) that has become obscure with time. The sun was out and the temps in the mid-seventies.

Remember my prophetic remark a couple of weeks ago… before temperatures dropped to just around freezing and I was showing you beautiful frosty fields? I predicted my morning glory days were over since so many were now blooming on the ground. I figured Jack Frost would definitely nip their final blooms off… wrong!

And now here we have arrived on the last day of November… rainy but still rather warm… with a cold front arriving tonight…just in time for the first day of December tomorrow! Elevator weather at its peak.

If I lived in the parts of the country experiencing record-breaking snow levels… I am sure I would be praying hard for apricity! Warmth amid the cold where the sun is your best friend.

Yesterday as many of you know was the day of giving so I took a meal to several neighbors.. But then I was surprised by a visit from Janet Bender ( my Juice Plus) friend who keeps me healthy. Janet’s husband is slowly recuperating from a stroke and Janet has been absolutely amazing all the way through this severe health challenge.

Yet she still finds time to make prayer shawls and all other kinds of shawls for those in need… she found this orange one she had made sometime earlier and immediately thought of me… my color!

Janet told about an expression one of the medical staff told her recently at the Presbyterian Village and I loved it. While conversing …the staff member paused, stared at Janet intently and then quietly whispered ” I see your heart.” Isn’t that a beautiful thing to say to someone?

So until tomorrow… Enjoy the last day of sweet November and take time to ” see other people’s heart.

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

Love… it really must make the world go round…. in conversation, literature, and quotes… the word ” LOVE” takes first place in usage around our earthly home. Even in these disturbing times… we say ” I love you” a lot more than we say ” I hate you.”

” Love Actually ” does affect every component of life… and Richard Rohr gives us an example of how taking love away from ” virtue” changes our lives from sunny to gray.

A dictionary defines ” virtue” as behavior showing high moral standards. Richard Rohr shows us what happens when love is not at the center of living a virtuous life.

If lOVE is the soul of Christian existence , it must be at the HEART of every other Christian virtue.

For example… Justice without love is Legalism.

Faith without love is ideology.

Hope without love is self- centeredness

Forgiveness without love is self- abasement

Fortitude without love is recklessness

Generosity without love is extravagance

Care without love is mere duty

Fidelity without love is servitude

Every virtue is an expression of love and no virtue is really a virtue unless it is permeated by love.

Aristotle took a practical approach… his ideas of defining ethics were based on what someone did for others and how this then impacted another’s actions and so on and so on. Aristotle’s ” Passing of Love.”

He based this linkage on the philosophy of ” Moderation in All Things.” Humans should enjoy their existence but… not be selfish . For every good fortune that comes one’s way… share it with others… bring happiness to their lives. Share your talents with others.

So until tomorrow… This Christmas spread the love by sharing yourself with a smile.

Today is my favorite day… Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

As much as failure is not something we would willingly seek or select… especially over success… if you take a minute to reflect back on the successes and failures in your own life… we humans fail more than succeed because… we’re mortal and one trait of being human is our inbred desire to learn new things… even when they hurt in the process.

None of us are born completely programmed to know how to walk, run, swim, jump, write, read, calculate, memorize,etc. -the list could go on and on. Our success in accomplishing each of these personal benchmarks depends on adult or older sibling mentors to demonstrate each process for us …to first emulate and then later differentiate with our own individual approach to learning … followed by re-creating.

I think Thomas Edison would be the first inventor to appreciate the modern expression… ” Learn how to fail smarter.” Isn’t that what Edison demonstrated repeatedly throughout his life… mistakes are just stepping stones leading us to the final correct solution or conclusion to a problem.

Edison understood how each failed attempt at creating a new invention got him one step closer to his/her final goal by simple elimination of the wrong ” detours ” …thus forcing the inventor back on the right path. In the end the final product was better than the original idea because so much had been learned from the process of eliminating mistakes.

This learning process can be applied to any situation in life… corporate ladder climbing, career changes, relationship quandaries, and yes… competitive sports. More and more we understand how physical prowess alone is not enough to be completely successful. Athletes must be mentally sharp, emotionally strong, and learn how to ” fail smarter” – by eliminating repeated costly mistakes.

Saturday… after the game… I felt sadness for the Clemson seniors ( of whom one was Coach Dabo’s own son-personal heartache) … and for Coach Dabo , himself, since I know he was frustrated and disappointed.

As I listened to Coach Dabo on his weekly Sunday show… I knew how difficult this particular show would be … and it was. He looked tired and his voice was strong but soft-spoken… his usual exuberance was missing.

He took the loss on his shoulders, apologizing to the fans and congratulating South Carolina’s coaching staff for a job well done. Dabo is always a class act and with one more game to play… he knows he has to pull his team spirits up while simultaneously trying to correct the turn over problems that have plagued this team throughout the season.

A tough job and no doubt made even tougher by decisions on potential changes in game play and positions. Prayers for our beloved Tigers and coaching staff as they prepare for their last game of the season against UNC.

So until tomorrow… if done right… one day in the future we can all look back and remember the moment we took a leap of faith, took a different direction, and lo and behold, life ended up better that way!

Today is my favorite day – Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

Never have truer words been spoken. What happiness it brought this grandmother yesterday… the first time all the family has been together in a long time… coming in from Alabama and Fripp but everyone made it.

Our gourmet chef, Tommy, grilled out ( best hot dogs and hamburgers around town) and it was a perfect day to be outside!

We all know the ending of this happy reunion had one teeny tiny glitch- Clemson lost. Disappointing but congratulations to Carolina… in every competition there has to be a winner-loser category. The game had all the elements of a good novel… suspense, applause, sighs, frustration, exhilaration and a minute count down ending.

But as we also know …like with any good novel… another one is already being written… and who knows how it will end? Only time will tell.

So until tomorrow… there is no real ending… it is just a place where you stop the story. And then wait for the next one… and if you love football like my family… anticipation is half the fun!

Good-bye to my sweet ” home” this last Wednesday–Saturday- I felt like I was staying in a five star hotel! I got so spoiled

Today is my favorite day/Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

Traditions date back to the earliest human civilizations… actually since the dawn of time. They fulfill four criteria for achieving the ” Four B’s”- Being, Belonging, Believing, and Benevolence.

Since traditional gatherings outlive generation after generation… they make us feel connected to the ones who came before us and those who will follow. The human being might be mortal but through generational ancestors we can all live forever… remembered for being part of a living tradition.

Traditions show us that we don’t live in a vacuum-but that this period of time we live in…is connected to all time… the time that preceded us and the time that will follow us-we become part of something larger than ourselves, part of the eternal mystery taking place in ” the fabric of life.”

We have just finished celebrating Thanksgiving with Christmas racing towards us at breakneck speed… to be followed just as quickly by the next holiday. The largest component of family storytelling centers around family holidays. ” Do you remember that Thanksgiving long ago when Bobby…? ”

The old adage in this part of the country is ” In the South… first comes Faith,then family and then football! ” And so it does… and today all the families are descending on Tommy and Kaitlyn’s home to watch the Clemson-Carolina game… a tradition ” older than dirt” one announcer once commented. ( Well almost 1896!)

For a grandmother… no matter the occasion … holiday or football game…just happy to see all the family together at one time. It gets harder and harder to pull these gatherings off anymore with 100% participation!

I love the Tiger Paw surrounded by birds/I was awakened Friday morning by the sound of flocks of birds landing… when I looked out the B&B side… I thought for a moment it had snowed… white seabirds had flown in and were eating away in front of the house. Tommy and Kaitlyn had not seen them before! A ” Black Friday” white-feathered God Wink !

So until tomorrow… May blessings protect both team’s players today and keep them safe from injury… and may they, in return, realize just how blessed they are to live in this country … the country of the free and the brave… remembering those who sacrificed everything for them to enjoy the thrill of sports and competition at home!

Today is my favorite day… Winnie the Pooh!

Dear Reader:

The Graces were the Greek Goddesses who represented beauty, grace, and gratitude. The sculpture was just not seen as a monument but a conscious ” stumbling block” prompting man to slow down and look around… before chasing the next alluring siren of adventure…. to pay homage to the present gift of life… pure and simple gratitude.

And isn’t that what Thanksgiving does? It provides a ” speed bump” between us and the escalated frenzy of holiday commercialism. Time for a deep breath on the real meaning of Christmas and priorities set accordingly.

Yesterday for me… Thanksgiving did just that… Tommy, Kaitlyn and I picked up Ben and went to Kaitlyn’s parents ( Butch and Susan Swicegood’s) home … and had the most delicious meal with great conversation and laughter… and lots of barks!

After Thanksgiving lunch Ben and Tommy went putting at the golf course… the rains held off… a perfect Thanksgiving day!

I want to take a moment this Thanksgiving and thank all of You Chapel of Hope readers for your continued support, comments, and encouraging texts and emails.

It is you who makes me slow down for the next speed bump and instead of then speeding up…share a moment …a God Wink with you!!! For all of that … Thank you! Such touching Thanksgiving messages … meant so much to me.

So until tomorrow …

Thanksgiving is also Turkey Birthday Month… my nieces Carrie and Catherine and sister-in-law Susan Cadwell… take turns with their birthdays falling on Thanksgiving… literally… every year or the day before or after. SO Happy Birthday everyone! All of you are so giving! And the rest of us are so thankful for each one of you!

Today is my favorite day! Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

Like most holidays… Thanksgiving stares back at us all month through the ” coming up” date marked on our November calendar. And then ” suddenly” it appears and then disappears as quickly as a sunbeam.

It is up to us… to pause amid the food and clatter to look around and ” feel” Thanksgiving. Tomorrow I will share some of those moments with you that I discovered and put to memory.

But today-Thanksgiving Day-I want to share a ” Manifesto” with you… not just any manifesto but one I felt such an affinity to after the first time I read it. As a lifelong history teacher most manifestos seem more political than an expression of personal values but the definition of a manifesto simply means … a written statement of an individual or group’s beliefs and aims.

Magnolia Magazine’s (Joanna Gaines) Magnolia Manifesto is so profoundly written that I find myself checking off each belief every time I read it in acknowledgment of our shared values ( and wish our ‘house and senate’ had similar goals and aims for our country. )

WE BELIEVE

We believe in home, that it should restore us from today and ready us for tomorrow.We believe in friendship, because friends who feel like family are the best kind of friends, and that nothing matters more than family.

We believe in seeking the balance between hustle and rest and learning to find contentment in both. We believe everyone deserves a seat at the table and everyone has a story worth telling.

We believe in human kindness , knowing we are made better when we all work together. We believe in courage, in cartwheeling past our comfort zones and trying something a little bit scary every day.

We believe that failure needn’t be a negative thing; rather, we learn from our mistakes and fail smarter next time. We believe in doing good work that matters and, in choosing that, nudging others toward doing the same.

We believe that newer isn’t always better and that it’s time for the pendulum of trend to swing back to the basics. We believe in unearthing beauty, however hidden or subtle it might be.

We believe that each day is a gift and that every day miracles are scattered about if only we have eyes to see. And of all heroic pursuits large or small. We believe there may be none greater than a life well loved.

So until tomorrow…

Today is my favorite day. Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

In 1863 a live turkey was sent to the White House for the Lincoln family to feast on for the Christmas meal. Tad Lincoln, 10, youngest son of the Lincoln’s, quickly befriended the bird, named him ” Jack” and taught Jack to follow him as he walked around the White House grounds. Tad fed and cared for him faithfully .

As the time neared to begin preparation for the Christmas meal…and the cook ( executioner) weighed Jack to see how plump he was… Tad, in a panic, burst into one of his father’s cabinet meetings upset and crying. Stuttering he explained that he was told Jack was about to be killed and he needed a note from his father to stop the proceedings.

Sobbing…Tad cried out” Jack must not be killed! It is WICKED!” He’s a good turkey and I don’t want him killed!”

So Lincoln paused in the midst of the cabinet meeting and wrote an order of reprieve. Jack’s life was spared-Tad raced out to show the cook the note !

Historians report that Lincoln’s famous pardon probably stemmed back to an incident in his own youth. Apparently a flock of turkeys descended around the Lincoln’s log cabin in Indiana suddenly . Father, Tom Lincoln, was gone so Abraham felt obliged to shoot one for the family… which he did.

But later he saw the beauty of the bird whose life he ended and was so upset that ( in his own words) he never again ” pulled the trigger on any larger animal game.”

A year Later… On November 8, 1864-Lincoln was elected to a second term in office. A special polling place was set up on the White House grounds for soldiers to vote. Looking out his window Lincoln spotted Jack the turkey seemingly waiting in line to vote too.

Laughing he asked Tad if Jack was voting… to which Tad replied ” No, father… he’s under age.”

Today there is a sculpture of Jack the Pardoned Turkey in Hartford, Connecticut.

So until tomorrow… As we all begin preparations for Thanksgiving… let’s remember the preparation begins with the heart… being thankful for friends, family and blessed opportunities to gather together.

Today is my favorite day… Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

Did you know that eye contact is central to the human experience? Humans are the only primates with white eyes who are drawn to eye contact from infancy?

Infants follow parental eyes rather than head motions. They have been “seeing” since they were in the womb… vision is blurry but shapes and feelings draw little ones to love.

Eye contact is the most powerful way to make another person feel recognized, understood, and validated. Haven’t we seen and heard the sadness in troubled youth who admit that they never felt like anyone ever ” saw ” them… they were just invisible.

Looking someone in the eyes while conversing or addressing them deepens relationships and is perceived as a powerful character trait. Deeply rooted in our DNA … eye contact with our cavemen ancestors-making eye contact could mean the difference between life and death. They saw themselves through others’ eyes and that produced self-awareness … long before before mirrors did.

” Eye contact” was coined in the early 1960’s but was a term that came about from the West that signified this act as a meaningful and important sign of confidence and respect… eye contact and a handshake sealed many a business dealing… especially a loan on a promise of character.

In my family… we were taught as children to look adults in the eyes in conversations… it showed respect and good breeding. So mother had little tolerance for any adult who didn’t look you in the eyes during an introduction.

Ben got the backlash of this when the new young track coach in high school brought him home from practice to get mother to sign a permission slip for him to stay overnight in a hotel with the other competitors for the state track meet in Columbia.

Mother wouldn’t sign it until she met the coach and ” sized” him up. Apparently the young coach was nervous, mumbled through the introduction and never once looked mother in the eye while talking.

That was it… she didn’t sign it… the buses were leaving the next morning and all night Ben begged mother to let him go. He packed his bag-called the coach and explained the problem… one bus came by the house and the nervous coach managed to make eye contact with mother-she finally gave her permission and a very relieved coach and Ben left for Columbia-Ben placed second in one event and first in another.

Mother always re-told that story on the importance of looking people straight in the eyes to show good faith and most importantly character. The memory always ended with mother’s final comment…” I gave in because I figured that poor boy ( the coach) didn’t have a mama to teach this to him.”

So until tomorrow… Mother was a ” Shoulders back, look everyone in the eyes while talking” kind of mom. These two lessons have proved invaluable throughout my life. Thanks mom!

” Reflect upon your present blessings… of which every man has plenty… not on your misfortunes… of which all men have some.” ( Charles Dickens)

Today is my favorite day… Winnie the Pooh