Chapel of Hope Stories

Dear Reader:

I had to laugh out loud the other day when I watched an interview with Dolly Parton and she had the audience laughing galore with her last common sense piece of advice… and witty observation … which was:

” Wherever you go… well… THERE YOU ARE!”

Dolly should have been a comedian… she paused just long enough to have the audience leaning forward in their seats to hear the second part of the statement. When they heard it… for a split second there were slightly puzzled expressions… then the laughter erupted! They had ” been had” but still the advice was sage and sound. Just common sense advice-a novelty today!

I think the times we are living in now- will one day, be described as ” The Extraordinary Age of Extremism.” For a ” Scales” Libra gal …whose lifelong mantra has always been ” Moderation in all things” ( thanks Socrates) … a gal who believes that the key to happiness and success depends on keeping our lives in sync and balance… these extreme political figures sprouting up, like bad weeds pretending to be flowers, are deeply troubling to me… and I don’t think I am alone with this apprehension.

All gardeners know that if dangerous weeds aren’t pulled but allowed to grow… they will take over your garden. Gardeners understand the old wise weed advice-” Don’t let weeds go to seed.”

As we watch some quite ” interesting” candidates throw their hats in the ring… I keep trying to think of someone who could run on a common sense platform and win!

I would have to talk my visionary candidate into returning from blessed bliss-heaven to return to … well… not heaven… but still our beloved country… and she is ( drum roll) Erma Bombeck-the Queen of Common Sense. After all it is Women’s History Month. And we sure could use some more humor in the news!

” Knowledge is knowing a tomato is classified as a fruit; Common Sense is not putting it in a fruit salad. ” Yep… we need more common sense these days and wit! We need Erma!

And here are some more of her takes on many of the issues facing America today and her platform! Good advice!

MEDICAL: ” Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.”

” Getting out of a hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You’re not out of it until the computer says you’re out of it.”

TRANSPORTATION:

” Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?

” It goes without saying that one should never have more children than car windows.”

” There is nothing more miserable than flying into paradise and discovering you do look like your passport photo.”

” Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.”

” Car designers are just going to have to come up with automobiles that outlast the payments.”

CHILDCARE REFORM AND FUNDING: YES!

” Motherhood is the biggest on-the-job training program in existence today.”

OUTLOOK ON SUCCESS: ” Success is outliving your failures.”

PREDICTION: ” When humor goes, there goes civilization. “

So until tomorrow: Find ways and time to remember happy incidences shared with a friend or friends … ones who will even sing the Oldie Goldie tunes you loved together… ( over the phone) – it releases so many worrisome toxins from our present times… replaced by joyful memories!

Today is my favorite day- Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

These days when I look in the mirror I see someone who is one of the luckiest people alive… with the emphasis on ” alive.”

For many people who have survived a near/death experience or a medical crisis… life is never taken for granted again and somehow everything in life is more beautiful -the birds chirp more melodiously, the sun is brighter, the moon and stars shine more beautifully, but most importantly… the enduring life lesson ( from it all) brings us to the realization that physical imagery is just that… physical …but the real ” self” is much more. Humans are layered with so many different forms of intelligences that make up the ” being” in humans.

It is that ” being” that connects us to our spirituality, our universe, and most importantly our Creator.

Today, seemingly, everyone wants to jump on the ” Quotient” bandwagon and come up with another new ” Letter” quotient or intelligence.

When I was growing up… it was only the IQ test that was used to predict future success in a student’s life. The ” average Joe” got left behind in the prognosis of a financially successful career and life style.

Today, however, statistics show that EQ is as good or even better than IQ in predicting both career and personal success. High Emotional Intelligence people consist of the ones who are there for you in a crunch… they just don’t crunch financial numbers but hold your hand through a crisis.

Case-in-point … my Horace Mann insurance agent, Stephanie Rankin, who came to my rescue when my car was stolen and damaged beyond repair. I needed my insurance money to put down on another car but this was the same time period that my foot surgery went askew … becoming infected requiring thrice weekly trips to Wound Care in Charleston and I was not allowed to drive.

Stephanie came to me with my leg propped up in the air… and fought for a good return on my insurance remittance and ran errands to pick up and get vital information forms from the car dealerships. An angel with a briefcase! Obviously quite intelligent… Stephanie’s EQ must have also been off the charts.

So until tomorrow… A mirror is just a piece of glass. What you see is up to you.

To me… the EQ and KQ tests are the most important… it is not enough to know facts… it is the style of the delivery and explanation of information to the customer or client that is most remembered. Better said… the people who go the extra mile for others.

Today is my favorite day… Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

What a fun day Thursday was! Bruce and Marcia ( Mollie’s parents) are down visiting from New Hampshire. They left their home in Clarendon with snow falling and are very happy to be in Lowcountry weather with golf for Bruce to play and flowers for the girls to plant.

I was just so happy to finally connect with Marcia and Bruce since I missed them on their last two visits. Both times I was at Edisto with the Ya’s… but the third time, this time, was a charm!

And that ” charm” took us to Sullivan’s Island to eat lunch at The Obstinate Daughter. I had heard about it and knew family and friends who had eaten there… but to date… I had not. So I was quite excited when I got the news!

I don’t think I am alone in wondering about the restaurant name and the story behind it. When we asked our wonderful waitress she said the origin goes back to the American Revolution and is symbolic of the defiance of the patriots fighting off the British Navy at the Battle of Sullivans Island.

The response just ” wet my appetite ” for I wanted to hear ( as Paul Harvey always said) ” the rest of the story.” Why is it an ” obstinate daughter” … Was a woman fighting at the battle or risking her life to tend to the wounded? Before I give you the answer ( required some research) let me give you their website’s explanation.)

Our name, The Obstinate Daughter, is an homage to the rich revolutionary war history of Sullivan’s Island.

On June 28, 1776, under the command of Colonel William Moultrie, the defenders of Fort Sumter foiled the British fleet’s attempt to capture the city of Charleston at the Battle of Sullivan’s Island. This first American Patriot’s victory inspired a London political cartoon to depict the ” Defiant Defenders of Charleston.

Obviously the name was created to include the state name-Carolina and surname-Sullivan for the fort and battle. An important but costly lesson was provided by another female – Mother Nature.

The powerful British navy was defeated by lack of knowledge about ebb tides, water depth miscalculations, their cannon balls were absorbed by the Palmetto log fort that turned the balls into sponges, and British ships ran amuck on hidden sand bars…or perhaps a better term” the vessels ran ” a-mud.”

In New York City we have the Statue of Liberty or ” Lady Liberty” to symbolize freedom. In South Carolina we remember the symbolic ( British cartoonist) ” Miss Carolina Sullivan” the defiant southern symbol of freedom through grit and determination … defiance in the face of overwhelming odds and trust in God to see freedom ring!

So until tomorrow ( restaurant owner’s mantra) ” To us, the ” Obstinate Daughter” is a beautiful reminder that the stubborn refusal to change one’s course of action can change the course of history.”

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Pooh

We gals stopped and picked up more plants and flowers… Mollie got everything planted in record time. Beautiful!

Dear Reader:

When I ran home last Friday from Mt Pleasant to Summerville to check my mail, plants and flowers for water… everything was still popping open… including my front yard pear tree. I could hardly wait to see it Tuesday afternoon as I left Mandy’s and John’s to return home with John’s return.

But the first thing I noticed was that the pear tree wasn’t filled with white blossoms… my favorite phase for it… green leaves were forming so rapidly the blooms were dropping or just not opening. Out with the white… in with the green… skipping right over the beautiful white blossoms.

Then when I went to check on the gardens… I started gasping again… the large beautiful Formosa bushes had already bloomed and some blossoms were sadly drooping! In three days ( from Saturday to Tuesday) this transition had resulted.

I walked around in dismay… my favorite garden time… and it was blowing by faster than a race car! Stop! Slow down!!! I want to enjoy every minute of the return of old familiar plants, flowers, and trees. No more of this stopping by and leaving without staying for a long visit! I was gone a week and didn’t even get to wave good-bye to many of my old ” friends.”

I am sure our crazy elevator weather is a large part of the culprit-(we keep breaking) heat records… now this week we drop about 20-25 degrees -certainly closer to our normal seasonal weather. ( Even as I just typed it… I realized that I need to stop referencing the word ” normal ” when ” normal” weather is becoming a phrase of the past… while these extreme weather patterns appear to becoming the ” norm.” )

On days when I let my imagination (about the future) wander… I wonder if , one day, Summerville will be the new front beach recreational property. We are already hearing the warnings about ice bergs melting and seas rising and flooding coastal towns and cities.

Thankfully I probably won’t be around to see it… but will future generations have out-smarted nature or will land and water maps be completely re-done to show the encroaching oceans and diminishing land masses? Like our seasonal changes… the ” times they are a’ changing.”

But isn’t it nice to know God is bigger than man’s mistakes in being terrible stewards of our beautiful blue home. Too often we act like spoiled children who never fully appreciated any gifts given… always wanting more and bigger. Greed… the culprit plague of human beings.

So until tomorrow… Take time to savor the beauty of our earth … just for the sake of beauty.

Today is my favorite day! Winnie the Pooh

I am seizing the moment-walking the talk… photo-ing the beauty at this precise moment on a ” normal” beautiful early spring day!

Dear Reader:

It is not just important to plant the right plant seeds ( like my moonflowers) at the right time… but the right ” people” seeds too. We must carefully choose the right seeds -from the packets titled ” Things I Love” or ” My Passion Seeds.”

Choosing the right seeds are our good seeds… the seeds who tell the world who we are and what we want to share with it. If we choose wisely… our seeds grow stronger … until the day they pop through the ground … reaching for the light.

If we plant the wrong seeds they will remain dormant, buried under the dirt and never bloom. Gone is the life that could have been-the opportunity to share our unique talents and passions with the world. Instead of being remembered as a ” life well lived” we are forgotten as the ” life not lived.”

The nice thing about planting seeds… is that we can re-plant as many times as we wish. It is never too late to bloom in different ” colors.”

Take our Birthday Girl Honey Burrell! ( Happy Happy Birthday Honey!) She had a completely fulfilling, award-winning career in teaching …working with disabled children. Then she and Mike bought a second home in the mountains and Honey re-planted again… this time in clay… and as they say… ” The rest is history.”

Today’s seasoned seeds have bloomed repeatedly in her second award-winning life passion. These days all you have to do is Google Honey’s name and write ” sculpture ” beside it…. up pops site after site after site on Honey’s gifted talents that she so generously shares with everyone!

So until tomorrow… Always make time to re-plant as seen fit… for as long as we are breathing… we are changing.

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Pooh

Jo shared with me a ” joyful” memory from her childhood that reoccurs, seemingly out of the blue, and it turns her day upside down with its remembrance.

It was an ordinary day but one from over 80 years ago that still returns… she was a little girl patting her dog, staring up at the clouds and felt a sense of euphoria sweep over her… she told herself that she always wanted to remember that particular day… and 80 years later… she still does ( in first person, memorable scents and sounds still intact! )

Dear Reader:

As we grow older… we come to recognize the significance of the treasured ” carriers of memories” still in our lives. These are the people who knew us when… as parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, cousins, neighbors and schoolmates, church pew sharers, best childhood friends- they all comprise our first initial self- identification stage of life.

This is followed up by close college friends, later teaching co-horts or business friends, club and children’s’ extracurricular activities in sports, dance… the other parents sitting on benches and bleaches with us …supporting our children… and finally fellow retirees sharing similar interests and recreational activities.

The most special ” carriers of memories” are, however the family members and best friends who have grown with us through the varied stages of life… the one who have been there sharing the most difficult experiences with us, the celebrated occasions, the people who can still see the person we were and the person we are. The ones who unconditionally support us.

The nice thing about the gift of age is that we keep accruing friends, who over time, all have lengthy friendships and deeper knowledge and understandings of who we really are …under many levels.

It is important to have these ” witnesses” to our earlier selves because we can’t always remember ourselves alone. An University of Alberta study concluded that ” the perspective through which we recall our own personal memories – either seeing it through our own eyes, in first person, or as an observer in third person, affects the vividness and potency of the memory. Stronger, more potent recollections are perceived in first person.

However, even though we reduce the ” vividness” and amount of emotion we feel, ( in third person) our ability to edit our memories is a good thing. It allows us to grow and it changes how we see ourselves now… especially, with troubled memories, it enables us to learn and move forward.

So until tomorrow… Let us be reminded daily to cherish our ” carriers of shared memories ” -the people who can still remember …what we remember …from our life’s journey to date. Who still love us…

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

As a child growing up …numbers were not my friend… early on reading and writing, history, and science captured my interest… but arithmetic sent me swirling with butterflies in my stomach.

I just never ” got it.” Unfortunately back then … fun activities, like dividing pizza pies or counting money correctly to provide an end of the year party… like I hear my grandchildren discuss today, were non-existent. Math, in my time, was just paper, pencil, and lots of erasing …mistake after mistake.

Today the butterflies are gone and I feel a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction each month paying my bills and dividing my savings by projected priorities. I can ” see” and understand numbers now.

Life experiences became my best teacher. I was terrified, after my divorce, the first time I had to figure out how to pay taxes, buy a car, apply for loans, pay mortgages, fill out college financial information for my children…but I discovered something important along the way…. people will help you when you are at your most vulnerable… they become your teachers. I was so fortunate to make new friends in the ” math world” of finances that had once seemed so alien to me.

Sometimes there is still that small child that wants to hide during a financial emergency … but more often than not, numbers no longer send me into paralysis mode. I know that I spent too many years worrying about numbers but they have proven to be my best friend.

I was given three years originally after my initial diagnosis of breast cancer and I left that ” dead-end” number behind well over a decade ago. I turned my life arithmetic answers over to God and so far… my personal arithmetic lesson has ” multipled.” I feel like I have been given more than my share of ‘ fish and loaves of bread’ watching my grandchildren grow.

So until tomorrow… we should all remember the 5 BY 5 Rule: If it is not going to matter in five years, Don’t spend more than five minutes being upset about it! Great Math Lesson!

Today is my favorite lesson -Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

I am a proud Summerville resident who has spent most of her life in one of the most beautiful towns around… a hidden treasure for years… that now exhibits its charm for the world to come see.

The continued success is due to the creative leadership and ” followers” ( citizens of Summerville) who strive to create a home town that offer’s accessible artworks, in the form of sculptures, throughout the many parks and allotted town spaces for teaching each sculpture’s history and heritage. Each sculpture tells a different story.

For example… the title picture ” Followers” depicts a fond childhood memory ( that most of us grew up playing ) called ” Follow the Leader.”

Have you ever considered how many lessons about life can be taught through this children’s game… with just a few added creative ” rules” to it?

The best ” leaders” ( we might remember) were the children who created the most fun movements to imitate… these leaders took into account the diversity of their ” followers” and offered an assortment of different ability level challenges that weren’t too easy or too challenging, so as not to cause frustration at inabilities to ” follow.”

Now let’s put this idea into an adult ” Follow the leader ” campaign for an office. What if the rules were tweaked from this childhood game and every follower had one verbal ” cue card comment” that simply said ” OUT!”

If anyone felt that the ” leader” was implementing too many potentially dangerous or harmful movements they could step out of the line while saying” Out” ! If half the number of followers opted ” Out”… the leader was automatically replaced with another leader chosen among the followers.

We adults can learn a-lot from children and maybe we should take note when to opt out from a leader and his/her campaign that doesn’t allow input from followers and puts self over followers exposed to extreme risky and dangerous paths.

So until tomorrow… May we, as Americans with courageous heritages, stay open to the original ideals that brought us freedom from tyranny. Let us opt out following anyone whose ideals don’t match what our own inner morality tells us.

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Pooh

Dear Reader:

At the start of the final sentencing Friday, in the nationally televised Alex Murdaugh trial, Judge Clifton Newman began referencing part of a quote that Alex Murdaugh, himself, had somewhat mentioned earlier… hoping , most likely, that Murdaugh would complete the familiar saying. He did not … but visually ascertained the verbal connection with a nod and glance at the judge.

I felt my hand raising, like in a school classroom, and yelling at the television… ” Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.” ( Sir Walter Scott)

Later… when I researched the origin of this familiar childhood warning ( in my family at least) I discovered it belonged to Sir Walter Scott. Grandmother Wilson made sure all of her grandchildren took this warning to heart and could repeat the saying. Once a lie was told… cover-up lies would certainly unfold… and complications grow out of control. ( We all learned, as adolescents, how right she was !) Don’t ” fib ” and / or if you do… confess and apologize.

Throughout the day, following the final sentence, the drama was repeatedly shown, regardless of the network or source. And each time I saw segments of it again, it became more obvious that Judge Newman was trying to give the accused time to speak to all those hurt by a vast accumulation of deceitful practices played out repeatedly over a long period of time… that didn’t happen.

I did discover that the Sir Walter Scott quote can be found in the epic poem-Marmion: A Tale of Flodden Field. It tells the story of a courtier of Henry VIII named Lord Marmion. He is smitten with a wealthy woman named Clara de Clare who, unfortunately for the suitor, is already engaged to another.

A devious scheme is designed to implicate Clara’s fiancé in a duel and initially it appears it has been successful. Marmion’s deceit defeats the honor of the honorable fiancé, but it is all in vain since Clara retires to a nun’s convent rather than marry Marmion.

At the end of the day … as several law enforcers and legal teams admitted… this senseless tragedy, with all of its complicated entanglements didn’t happen over night but over extended periods of time when personal decisions were repeatedly made that set the wheel in motion to a horrific tragedy.

So until tomorrow…In the big picture… there were no winners or losers… just sadness and disbelief in a life of deceit and darkness that hurt so many. What a sad legacy to leave behind… to take away the sunshine, the light … in exchange for darkness!

Today is my favorite day -Winnie the Pooh

Thursday two pigeons decided to lodge on the ledge above Mandy’s front door loudly “cukcooing” … apparently it is a good sign since pigeons are drawn to peace and calmness… Mandy and I laughed that the two pigeons left right before the children got home from school… so much for calmness!

Let’s always remember to follow the sun along our life’s path… no detours into darkness.

Dear Reader:

The other day a story on the origin of angel food cake popped up on my email… I almost deleted it… but then I started envisioning a slice and my mouth started watering.

Apparently the same thing happened to Rick Hamlin who took the time to research this “heavenly” topic… calling it ” The Story Behind the First Cake Made By an Angel.”

In his family …birthdays and angel food cake have always been synonymous- the only difference is the recipient’s choice of icing… chocolate or whipped cream, etc. But what everyone wants has always been the sweet fluffy ” insides”… so light it appeared almost airborne!

He started his research with 19th century cookbooks … since all historians agreed that this was the time period for its initial concept. Nothing too interesting there… just varied recipes/so he decided to use a more ” heavenly” source-scripture.

” So mortals ate the bread of angels ” …( Psalm 78:25) … in reference to manna-the heavenly food sent to sustain the Israelites fleeing Egypt.

A century or so later… Elijah gets to be the first official ” birthday boy” when caught in a parched land with no food or water.. and absolutely nothing to sustain him on his long journey home.

Tossing and turning one night, he feels the touch of an angel … soon after he discovers a cake baked on hot stones ( near his head) and a jar of water. It was the first cake baked by an angel. ” Get up and eat” …otherwise the journey will be too much for you” … he hears softly in his ear. I Kings 19:5-8.

The author concludes that from now on… on a family member’s birthday, the call will go out ” Get up and eat… Manna from Heaven.”

Well Mandy, Eva Cate, Jake and I haven’t had a slice of angel food cake yet… but the Twinkies came close… in a busy family… first soccer practice for Jake Wednesday night , long walks in Mt Pleasant and Daniel Island… we have been on the move!

Fun walk and talk with Ben on Daniel Island

So until tomorrow… more adventures await, no doubt… and I know many will turn into family memories to sustain us during future hard times.

Today is my favorite day-Winnie the Poo