Dear Reader:

Ben and I are in the process of going from one medical referral to the next since his move to Charleston from Conway. It almost becomes comical… at a certain age … the question is: How many doctors does it take to put ” Humpty Dumpty ” back together again ?

It seems like every doctor’s visit ends with a referral to another doctor-we lucked up with his heart specialist who put in his pacemaker-since he practices in Conway and Charleston but then Ben needed a regular cardiologist for availability if his heart acts up again and a neurologist to treat his vascular dementia which today’s doctor is referring us to-to update brain scans.

In the meantime I got a call from Conway for Ben’s semi-annual eye check-up-now they have to refer us to a ophthalmologist in Charleston and at lunch Ben was complaining with a sensitive tooth so might as well add a dentist to the mix.

Eventually Wellmore can provide transportation but , as we all know, those initial visits involve filling out insurance and medical histories that go far beyond what Ben can do. ( Honestly speaking some offices require so much information I spend more time in the paperwork than the doctor visit-I always look around and think ” Here I am a college graduate with a master’s degree and I am struggling-is everyone else in the waiting room ” faking it?”)

If I whisper to Ben that I don’t even know what half the medical abbreviations stand for-he calmly says ” Oh WE got this! ”

I don’t know whether to laugh or thump him on the head! He is happily leaving all the paperwork up to me to decipher and cutting up with the receptionists.

As I started in with him, when called yesterday, the nurse asked if the desk had checked my temperature too … told her ” no”-she sighed since the line waiting to be checked in was long-I assured her I always had a reptile temperature and had even gotten my booster-Ben quips ” If it isn’t Saturday night she is good to go.” It took the nurse a second to get it and then burst into laughter-Saturday Night Fever! Ben does a John Travolta move and in we go-maybe we need to take our act on the road! 🤣

At this stage in life-all we can do is laugh. Ever since returning from Vietnam and later dealing with PTSD symptoms… Ben always uses ” We” when telling about any incident. It used to confuse me but now I recognize he was trained as a Marine to think of your team’s welfare first over one ‘s individual needs-everything in wartime is done for the ” common good.”

These days I think Ben uses ” We” in talking about incidents, that only involve him, because it makes him feel less isolated and alone.

I started thinking about this…How many times have we encouraged a family member or friend by saying ” You’ve got this” before an important interview or meeting… when wouldn’t it be more powerful if we added ” Go on now… we’ve got this.”

So until tomorrow… There is nothing more beautiful in the world, than a heart changing ”

” Today is my favorite day” Winnie the Pooh

Happy Birthday to my favorite son-in-law John! My only son–in -law-but still my favorite! I love you John!