Dear Reader:

How many of you remember promising not to do this or that with your “bestest”  friend, as a child, linking pinky finger to finger. Most of the time this promise or swear involved not telling anyone else the secret you were just told or there would be dire consequences. The ritual was also performed to check to see if the other person was lying or telling the truth.

In our country the most commonly used “oath” for never revealing another friend’s secret was/is: “Cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.” (Looking back on the ritual as an adult… the pinky swear seems quite dramatic now…but then in a child’s world…promises were to be taken quite seriously.) Perhaps in our adult world…it might be time to bring back the pinkie promise or swear…it would be  refreshing to know a truth from a lie!

Actually pinkie promising or swearing is universal…children (and adults) from all over the world have been found to participate in this “sacred” oath among friends, a gesture to convince them that they are telling the truth and not lying. For example:

Japanese schoolchildren use the following “oath”:Yubikiri genman, uso tsuitara hari senbon nomasu, yubi kitta which colloquially means: “Pinky promise pledge: If you’re lying, I’ll make you drink a thousand needles. Pinky promised!”  (What is it with children and needles???)

Like Debbie Macomber came up with a “perfect word” idea for each year to help us work on certain areas in our lives we wish to improve upon and learn more about…Kate Wolfe-Jenson has come up with twelve “Kind Promises” for us to make for ourselves to live by throughout each year.

Jenson’s whole philosophy, since being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, has been to use this chronic and degenerative illness as an opportunity to transform creativity and apply it to the ever-changing challenges of the disease.

With the help of mentors she has learned that self-compassion is a necessary and  important “kind promise” she must make to herself…it is all right to grieve the loss of physical agility…but only to a point and then the rest of the time should be spent re-inventing daily rituals, using creativity, to find ways to compensate for the physical losses.

12 Kind Promises

*After “pinky” promises and swears…I saw some of the most beautiful pink I have ever seen from nature:

*As I was heading out a little after five o’clock yesterday afternoon the setting sun’s rays had fallen on Vickie’s Japanese Tulip in her backyard….I caught the top of it, visual from its height standing over the roof, and marveled in its beauty!

*Then another neighbor, Jane, gave me a Frances B. camellia, so named for Frances Blanton Muckenfuss by her father who loved camellias and creating hybrids. It is gigantic…Jane was afraid the freeze last night would hurt it. My Happy Room just got happier with this beautiful camellia in it.

 *And I can’t sign off without mentioning the beautiful full moon last night in all its glory…it was something to behold!