As wonderful as Wednesday was yesterday… Thursday spiraled downhill quickly.
Doodle came over to help change and pack the wound (Thank you God for her and her strong constitution to yucky things)…my wonderful nurse Bobbie had walked us through the process on the phone…and everything looked good and felt good. But then I had to put on my pressure “hose” (comes up to the knee) and instantly the skin around the wound started burning…as if on fire.
It is hard to describe but it really feels like someone is stabbing me with hot pokers…a terrible feeling and to date there is not a drug around my house that touches it…I was told it probably is nerve-endings like lightning and it strikes over and over.
All I know is that I found myself singing the lyrics to “Ring of Fire”…especially the one line by Johnny Cash “I fell into a burning ring of fire…and it “burns burns burns…the ring of fire…the ring of fire.” My sentiment exactly Johnny….thank you for describing my day yesterday.
Having gone through every treatment there is for breast cancer I can attest to the fact that this latest skin problem (with what seemed to just be a small scab wound) has brought me more pain that anything else to date.
I have always prided myself on having a high tolerance for pain but these constant “bee stings” are definitely getting on my last nerve. It affects more the tender skin around the wound than the wound itself…we think the skin is reacting to too many adhesives on it…so we are going to try to bandage a little differently to let the skin breathe more.
I just feel like if I could fall asleep …that somehow, miraculously, the pain would be gone…but it is hard to sleep when your body is so tense from pain…a no-win situation.
This experience has taught me even more compassion for people who live with pain daily in their lives…it must be the most challenging path to follow.
Right now it is hard to conjure up a reasonable explanation for this very uncomfortable situation but still I know deep down in my heart…that something good will come from this…even if it is a deeper understanding of others who live with chronic pain and disease.
Cancer is a frontier…one of the last ones we have here on earth. It is an unknown with researchers and doctors (explorers) discovering new ways to combat it continuously. In fact it has been new drugs that have arrived on the market…that have pulled me out and up into new healing plateaus. I am eternally thankful for these cancer explorers.
I think that is why this latest turn of events has thrown me somewhat…because everything looked so good for the breast cancer part to have this pop up for whatever reason.
God who knows every star by name knows how to heal our wounds, great and small…and I feel sure it will be healed…hopefully this is just the third day blahs. Grandmother always told me that the third day after surgery (procedure) was the hardest…she’s right today and hope that means tomorrow will be much improved…counting on it!
Ruth Simons, author, wrote that when we cry out to the Lord asking “Lord, do you see my distress? Do you know all the details of what is breaking my heart” we are reminded He does. He is the wound-binder, the Heart-Healer and the Star-Namer.
So until tomorrow…
Janet Bender stopped by yesterday…she works with Juice Plus and keeps me full of wonderful healthy products. This time she was loaded down with everything she had to boost the protein levels in my body.
Shakes, salads, desserts…chocked full of protein.
What an amazing and generous person you are Janet…one of a kind! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your health tips, delicious food, and most of all… friendship. You are a great testimony to healthy eating…you look terrific Janet!